Looking for Calm

Two funerals within a week has taken its toll on Bill and me.  We both need down time but the calls keep coming for Bill.  There's always a crisis with someone in a congregation of about 400--yes, that many.  Though only about half attend, Bill's on call for the whole 400 and some days it seems he gets that many calls.  He's meeting another crisis this morning and I'm getting ready, well, will be, to meet my cancer survivor friend.  It's always good to see her but I feel drained afterward.  I'm comfortable just being at home by myself but I feel compelled to reach out.  Hopefully, Bill and I will have a couple of days off tomorrow and Sat. without interruption.  Though the interruptions are just that, Bill thrives on being wanted.  Usually, if I'm left alone, I'm just fine.

A Weekend to Crash

Boy, the last two weeks have been stressful what with R's hospitalization, his being in hospice and brought home to die, his death last Sunday, getting M around while L went home to pick up family, visitation at funeral home, funeral and dinner (yes, even dinner was stressful.)  Bill and I have basically collapsed today.  I tried to work on another make-over skirt but I don't have the stick-with-it today.  I've culled old emails in my files, looked at blogs, magazines and cleaned some clutter today.  It's been nice.  I've got to contact my cancer-survivor friend to make plans for lunch for next week but have since found out Bill's aunt died and he's to do the funeral on Tues. morning which means a trip to St. Louis on Mon. afternoon late and then all day in St. Louis and back.  Yippee.  Life goes on at the Smith house.  Good thing for today.

Gone

R's gone to heaven.  M's exhausted, sad and overwhelmed.  It's been a very long two weeks for her--really two years.  The disease has gradually pulled him down and it's finally over.  The funeral should be on Friday and they are expecting all of their family. L's going home to wait for his wife, daughter and new grandbaby (if the pediatrician says ok.)  I'm waiting to see if she will need me to help her in the next couple of days to get ready for them.  She and L have a long day today planning the funeral and she will be alone on, probably, Tues and Wed--maybe most of Thurs, too.  Since Bill's illness at the first of the year, I'm more in tune with the possiblity of that kind of loneliness.  Though Bill's back to "normal" now, I'm not fearing his death, just realizing that life is so short and unpredictable.  But...life goes on so, "Bye for now."

Been Busy

M has needed me this week. (Thank you, Lord, that I've been able to rest up from our vacation.)  Things are not looking good for R.  I created three dresses for the shop on Monday  (not looking good there either), made supper for church, lunch for M, visited with M many times this week, shopped for felt and hand-dyed it to enhance the colors.  I'm making Fall Flowers to put in Relics.  It feels good to create after four days.  Off to bake bread to take to M--flowers come later.

Home!

We're finally home after a 10-day vacation to see kids and grands.  Very fun.  Very tired.  Today we have a 9 o'clock joint brunch and worship session where we'll hear stories of some of the mission trips taken this summer.  Speedy Gonzales hit the floor running today, anticipating the "big day."  I, on the other hand, was awakened at 6:15 with SG saying, "Come on.  I want to be there at 7:30 'cause J will be there then." 
"Huh, what time is it?" Short time of pulling myself out of bed.  Thinking.  Saying, "Is there any reason why I have to be there at 7:30?"
"Oh, well, I guess not.  I just thought we'd go together."
Thinking.
"I'll be there later then." Begging off.  Wishing for an easing back into our crazy lives. Guilty because I probably could help some people there but I really don't want to.  Not SG.  Jump into anything with dress shirt and khakis.  Life is good......wish I shared his enthusiasm today.  Nope.  I'll be there later.  I'll help clean up.  Will that satisfy God today?  I hope so.
He left at 7:00.  Rarin' to go.  Ummph galore!
Whew! 
Gonna do some easing.